The Moon and The Spider
I have been working the grave-yuck shift for about four weeks or so now and just sick as a “pig with swine flu” for the half of that . I have lost track of the balance of day light and night time because I dont see much of the first. Lost track of what day it is, when breakfast and dinner should be, and my keys several times. Just keep plugging away, it is what it is.
I am working at a high school as an environmental authority in regards to the removal of some asbestos-containing roof material and the proper abatement procedures that need to be followed by the contractor in order for the job to be legal and for the client to remain protected from liability issues. I make sure the crew is doing their work by the book. The going is slow and it is really cold!
But here is my secret, dont tell a soul…
As the job is going and there is nothing for me to do in its regards for a while, I have had the opportunity to watch the moon rise and set. The real treat of this is I have watched it become full and now I can watch it wane completely, I can stand there uninterrupted for a while and longer as the fellas are on top of the roof. I can paint Her surfaces with anxiety, fear, anger, and dark unmentionables. As the moon wanes I am allowed to envision these damaging aspects dissipate and disperse into a sense of warmth and calm. Each night that goes by I pray diligently for this to be.
I had such a bad close of the first half of the cycle, painful stuff. My Covenmate, my pastor, my best friend had rescued me from further damage. It was as if I had lost sight of Perfect Love and Perfect Trust, he and his beautiful wife had reminded me of the true meaning of the often flippant cliche. He found me at that moment when you look up and ask “Why! Why is this happening?! WHY?!! Have you ever had one of those moments…?
Locked into a quiet state of mind and listening for the soft tones of a Mother’s voice, sitting on one of the student’s court yard benches I feel the wind pick up, and at 2:30 a.m. in the dessert it means cold, like your ears go numb and snot drains from your nose cold. I see an area by the student store, it has benches and is dimly lit by the soft glow of the nearby sodium lights. This is where I head off to and escape the chill, making sure that I have a clear unobstructed view of the moon.
As I was looking up I had noticed a small spider, the kind with the two big eyes, you know the kind that jump… Thats the name, jumping spider. Actualy the Latin name for this species’ family or phylum is Salticidae. These little guys are really pretty social and its almost believable to think that they like to “play” by the way they hop around to avoid a curious poking or following finger. When I have come across them in the backyard I have taken the time to get a good look at them, tiny little spiders. Some are black, some are grey with dark racing stripes, two things obviously shared in common is their incredible ability to jump, and those really big strange cartoonish eyes!
The spider, whom I have named after someone that is close to me and whom I know well enough, for the meaningless grin of things, had been startled or was just clumsy and had free fallen from over head. On our scale this fall would have easily measured a 500-600 foot drop! I was relieved for him when I noticed he had tethered himself to the ceiling, what next? As he, isolated in his suspended state of hung, wait motionless for a moment and breathed a sigh of relief to know that not all had been lost, realizing that he had not hit the concrete or fell to a situation in where his safety might be jeopardized by a mouse, cockroach, or worse yet an unaware passer-by. With grief and anguish he had looked up to the ceiling and began to climb, hands over hands. One-two-three, one-two-three, up he climbed. It would be just as easy to let out some more web and just go to the bottom, but he didn’t. In fact, It would have been a little quicker to have just let the thread go… but the future in that could have cost him more in the end.
He knew that home was way the heck up there and it would just take a long time to get back to his peaceful spot. Back to the safety and warmth of the flush mounted ceiling light, back to the electric luluby hum that he could only begin to dream of while he climbed and climbed, until it felt as though his heart were to busrt from his thorax! In this time, he had climbed back up his cable at least two feet, eating his thread as to not leaving any evidence behind that would give his situation away, or to become entangled in his only life-line. It all would be ok as soon as he got home, as soon as the hanging time was finished. He kept looking up, he kept climbing, he kept dreaming.
I felt empathetic towards my new subject of astonishment, and set up one of the many ladders that were leaning against the wall parallel to his journey on a string. I pinched his web-cable about six or so inches above from where he pendulated back and forth, and brought it up to the corner of the light’s frame holding one hand under him just incase my plan had failed. He looked at me with deep question, only that to equal my amazment of his determination. There he swung. The web was holding, and he was now mere inches from home. He still climbed.
